Battle of the sexes in the fashion world

When it comes to the battle of the sexes in the fashion world, it is clear who is way ahead. Men!

As I drag myself out of bed feeling fat and frumpy, I decide its time to update my wardrobe. I know its not advised to go shopping on a fat day, but I decide to go, as I doubt I'll find the man of my dreams wearing my ex boyfriends Pjs and my Bridget knickers.

So, as I walk down the high street, for what seems like hours, looking for a pretty bra to support my spaniel's ears and for that perfect outfit, that is chic, comfortable, funky, fashionable, and has the capacity to hold in every inch of my Shamu shaped middle, it strikes me. The only way forward in the fashion world would be to become a man!

Everything men can get their grubby mitts on has an edge, be it boxers, belts, jeans or bags they all have a degree of funk. Variation is the key to successful fashion. If you look in the women's section of most fashion outlets, all you find are shapeless dresses, which if over a size 8 and under 5 ft 11 inches tall, are out of the question. Whereas, a quick scan of the men's section, can make you feel as good as a PMT queen in a chocolate factory. Colour variation, materials galore and more than just one "60's" style.

If only I was a man, I say to myself, as I walk round the floor idolising the alternative styles. Now men now carry handbags, or should I say 'manbags' and wear sarongs on the beach, they wear all the things we wear. So, what are we going to be able to moan about in our wardrobes? Some guys even wear heels now, so there goes that one too!

The funk factor completely takes over when it comes to t-shirts. Men practically over-rule women in this area of fashion, for once men can wear something without the assistance of a woman. (Saying that, it was probably a woman who designed it, but for the sake of the male pride, we'll leave that bit out.)

Men's t-shirts ooze style. I don't mean the ones that state that they have a larger manhood than an elephant, I'm talking about retro tennis t-shirts or individually designed t-shirts with all the colour in the world splattered across the front. Stripes, logos, dots, collars, buttons, pockets, fraying and pictures, men's t-shirts can be adapted to practically any occasion. Women's t-shirts on the other hand are lacking formality, and even though some places can provide us with distinctively 'cool' t-shirts, they lack something, something I just can't quite put my finger on.